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October 25, 2021
Disconnecting from online outrage by understanding the WHY.

I'm old enough to remember a time when my eyes weren't glued to a 6 inch screen.

I was in JR High when my mom first introduced me to the online world, and she set me up to use some kind of "kid internet" where I could only access kid friendly mini games, videos, music, etc. I thought it was the coolest thing! At that point I was used to playing with Barbie's and doing other offline activities, so the internet was a pretty exciting addition to my arsenal of entertainment.

After a few months of using the kid internet, my mom upgraded me to AOL. This time I had access to pre-teen message boards, chatrooms and webpages. Once again I was excited because prior to AOL, I had to make friends the old fashioned way (usually sitting in the recess yard by myself, playing with my Furby and hoping that some equally-anti-social kid just so happened to be a Furby enthusiast).

I was awkward, and I knew this very early on. So when I learned that I could meet new people online, I used my 1-hour a day internet privileges to get better at socializing. (Yes, 1 hour a day. You thought my mom was going to allow her 12 year old daughter on the internet for hours on end? HA! More on this later...)

Every day I would come home from school and do my homework before booting up the internet. I was always excited to explore the endless chatrooms and the diverse conversations that came with it. Even as young kid, I was tolerant to the idea that other online users might have different interests, opinions and values. I understood that the internet, even in its infancy stages, was a market place of ideas. And if my pre-teen self was truly offended by these ideas, I could simply exit out and look for another chatroom to join.

What I wasn't prepared for, however, was the realization that some people simply wouldn't like me. There was one time I remember participating in a group discussion with a few other teenagers, and I noticed that one of the participants kept ignoring my chats when I would ask them questions or add to the conversation. Eventually it became glaringly obvious that they were avoiding me, and at the time I couldn't help but feel like I did something wrong! So, I privately slid into that person's DM's (or AIM if the cool kids remember). I asked him, "Did I do anything wrong?"

Surprisingly the kid typed back, but I wasn't prepared for his response:

"I don't like niggers", he said.

Pardon me? I couldn't believe it. He even clarified by telling me he was racist, specifically, towards black people and so was his entire family. As shocking as his response was, I still appreciated his honesty. I just wasn't use to people not liking me in the online world.

In person, I was always brushed off as a weird and awkward classmate, but I was more understanding if people disliked me because at least they had more to base their judgment on. Judging people online however, is very different because there's minimal context and nuance available. So needless to say I was caught off guard when I realized how quickly a stranger could write me off without TRULY knowing me.

Now here's the part where I get to brag. How do you think I handled this situation? Did I call this person out through message boards or online journals to inform everyone of how racist this person was? Did I report their account for having the audacity to have feelings, as wrong as they were? Did I retaliate by reminding this person how much of a piece of shit they were for feeling the things that they did?

No, I didn't do any of that.

Despite how unprepared I was for someone to pass judgment on me with as minimal information as they had, I also recognize that human beings are allowed to feel how they feel. I'm sure we all know someone who's cried over spilled milk before, I certainly have. But that context and nuance is important to understanding WHY I cried over miniscule things. If you understand the why, you might be able to fix the problem.

I was curious what it was about me, specifically, that led him to this point. In fact, our conversation lasted over the span of a few days because I made the effort to say hello to him whenever I signed online. I didn't have to do this, after all I was a nigger according to him. He also never blocked me, which he could have done at any point considering he didn't like black people.

But I also didn't block him either, because I was invested in understanding his WHY.

Too often I'll see online users respond to 'hate speech' with MORE hate and shaming, by making a public spectacle of the matter. What kind of logic deprived rationale is that? Imagine if MLK addressed hate in the way that social justice keyboard warriors currently do. Or if Daryl Davis, the black man who convinced KKK members to abandon their robes (through conversation), instead chose to punch them in the face.

Come to think of it, I don't think we need to consider events that far back, because what I'm describing is happening in present time.

I grow very concerned when I hear people suggest that physical assault is the solution to saying the N word (or any other form of 'hate speech'). Realistically, who's really at fault here? The guy that said the word, or the guy who assaulted another for saying the word. One act is criminal and the other is not. One act exemplifies fearless by avoiding self censorship, and the other shows weakness by allowing a word to decimate your self-worth. I realize some people will disagree with me on this statement and to that I ask you to consider what the goal is for addressing hate speech as keyboard warriors do now, versus how I did it back in the 90's.

If your goal is to genuinely end racism, then you'd be invested enough to consider the consequences of HOW you address that racism. I realize that many can't grasp this concept, which Is why I've accepted the reality that racism (or other forms of hate) will ALWAYS exist. If people were truly serious, they would treat these interactions with care and consider all options before defaulting to modern day online execution, for clout and sympathy.

Yes, I sympathize with their inability to be the bigger person.

The online world was a gift and a curse at the same time, because I don't think the forefathers of AOL considered how unreasonable people would treat online discourse. But then again, maybe they did consider it. Seeing how divisive the online space is, it certainly feels like they knew.

That said, with great power comes great responsibility. And if we accept the power to be connected with millions of people in the online space, then we need to take responsibility in understanding how to use said power. So I'd like to leave you all some tips on how to make online life a little less chaotic. Parents, I want to start with you:

What is the purpose of your child having a smart phone? Is it to communicate with the family, or is it to communicate with friends? And do you know who their friends are and what values they hold? Are you familiar with what apps your child has on their phone or how often they spend on these apps? Does your kid view social media as reward for hard work or a necessity to live? Are you ensuring that the values you've instilled in your child are not being overwritten by influencers on TikTok or Twitter?

To put it bluntly, are YOU raising your child, or is an app raising your child?

As a kid, I had 1 hour of internet per day, with limited access to websites. If I wanted to explore the web beyond the confides of the parental controls my mom put in place, I had to request access to get permission. This allowed her to review the sites I wanted to see, and as I got older, she loosened up those restrictions along the way, essentially giving me time to mature. To often I'll see teenagers glued to their phone in public, or even worse, when they're on the job. This makes me wonder how much of a balance, if at all, they have with social media. It's up to the parents to take control of their kid's online experience, or face the inevitable consequences of raising intolerant and emotionally weak adults. Now imagine if emotionally weak people went on to have kids...The result is how I see today's online political discourse.

Not to mention the growing trend of cancel culture! I'd be very weary of allowing a child to free roam the internet when there have been enough of College sponsorships revoked over something a kid tweeted when they were 10.

As for the adults or kids that are curious enough to read this blog, I'd recommend practicing self control and developing a balance of online life and reality.

The next time someone says something mean to you online, consider your reaction. What's your goal with engaging with this person? Is it to stick up for yourself? I can commend that, but understanding that online hate is inevitable will help you gauge if a response is worth your time. If your goal is to change someone's mind, or weed out the behavior that you think is corroding society, it's best to check your OWN behavior before adding to the corrosion.

Additionally, I would be cognizant of how much time you spend on social media or apps. I can understand it from the perspective of someone who needs these things to run their business (guilty as charged), but it's very easy to forget that there's a beautiful world waiting to be explored, beyond screen that you're using to read this blog.

That said, here are some things that have helped me maintain a balance:

1. Sleep with your phone atleast 5 feet away from you. This forces you to get out of bed to shut off you alarm, and it prevents you from scrolling on social media before bed or right when you wake up.
2. When you wake up in the morning, don't look at your phone. Give yourself time to take care of YOU. Have some coffee, make some breakfast, take a shower, walk the dog. You first, THEN phone.
3. When you're hanging out with friends, watching a movie, or doing some other in person activity, consider leaving your phone in another room to limit distractions. Be in the moment! (bonus if you can put the damn phone down when you're at a concert! Yes, everyone else in the crowd has the SAME footage of the singer on stage. Your footage isn't special, so just enjoy the music!)
4. If you don't have the will power to keep the phone down, consider using an app (I HIGHLY recommend or
5. Reflect on your online/app use. Some phones have features that document your daily screen time and what apps or sites you visit the most. This will help you figure out what's drawing you in so you can catch yourself as it happens. When my Youtube channel started gaining traction, I became addicted to checking my analytics to see how many new subscribers or viewers I got. Once I realized that I kept opening up my YouTube dashboard throughout the day, I challenged myself by limiting my visits to once per week which freed up a lot of my time.
6. Consider putting that phone to use, but in a more productive way. One of the consequences of constant social media use is that it made me very anxious. "What are my haters saying about me? Did I drop followers? Am I getting cancelled again??" These were the common questions that I kept asking myself only a year ago today. When I got very anxious, it sometimes lead to depression. And when I was depressed, it often lead to a messy apartment. And if my apartment is messy, I remain frustrated AND depressed because now I can't find what I'm looking for and I'm too embarrassed to have friends over!

Sounds chaotic, huh? Thankfully I was able to fix this by first understanding the WHY. Last year I became very anxious when I saw the world going to shit due to the plandemic, BLM, militant pronouns and endless speeches about white supremacy. I was frustrated a because I knew that the people in power were lying, but I couldn't do anything about it. But then I realized, I can't possibly DO anything, if I didn't truly understand the WHY.

Instead of doom scrolling the headlines and sifting through propaganda, I decided to kill two birds with one stone by listening to audiobooks while cleaning my apartment. So while I was busy mopping floors, I learned about the Marxist tactic of using slander to get what you want (see Rules for Radicals), or that Communists, historically, make a point to weaponize the feelings of black people to push their agenda (see Color, Communism and Common sense), or that the idea of men becoming women and women becoming men, has been use as a battering ram throughout history, as means to advance political movements (search cultural critic Professor, Camille Paglia, on YouTube).

As for my racist "friend", I'm not sure if he ever changed his opinion about me and frankly I don't care. I didn't NEED his approval to feel validated, but I communicated with him as an equal (despite him not viewing me as the same), in the hopes that our interaction planted a big enough seed so that he thought carefully about making generalizations about black people in the future.

Only he knows if he actually changed but I can sleep well knowing that I won't be responsible for ruining his life in 2021, because I messaged him privately instead of taking my grievances to a public forum for current day activists to dig up and expose. People can change with the right guidance, patience and the willingness to hear them out.

If you truly care about making the world a better place, you'll always consider the bigger picture before reacting for the sake of your feelings.

(audio version coming later today)

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November 30, 2023
Is there scientific basis behind being LGBTQ? | REACTION
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Is Atheism more rational than Christianity? The internet thinks so!

If I had a quarter for every time someone thought I was more rational prior to becoming a Christian...

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Should conservatives be pro-choice to WIN VOTES? | MY RESPONSE

Recently I saw a tweet from someone pleading with conservatives to "drop" the abortion thing in order to "win votes". I've also heard similar sentiments from Christian-conservatives as well, which quite honestly, baffles me.

May 25, 2022
Gun control won't stop mass shootings

In 1989, China's Government declared martial law and sent over 200,000 troops to Tiananmen Square to slaughter thousands of unarmed protestors.

Keyword, unarmed.

The recent school shooting in Texas is a tragedy, but the calls to impose more gun control isn't addressing the root cause of the problem.

The same politicians who want to enact strict gun policy in the name of safety, are the same ones that:

  • Think it's normal for impressionable kids to take puberty blockers because they 'feel' like the opposite sex.

  • Ignore the rise in suicides that have resulted from COVID lockdowns, drug overdoses and teaching kids about gender identity and sexuality in school.

  • Blame gang violence and crime on white supremacy or racism

If these people truly cared about preventing mass shootings, they would start by addressing the spiritual degeneracy that leads people to commit acts of violence in the first place.

Better yet, if safety is a legitimate concern, then why aren't these politicians ...

Gun control won't stop mass shootings
May 19, 2022
Diversity Educators are Propaganda Pushers (w/audio)

What: Destabilization + Exploitation
Why: Centralize the publics focus
How: Pandemic + Black Lives Matter + LGBTQIA+


COVID Lockdowns (work/learn from home) ensured a large majority of the population would be at home.

The urgency that the pandemic created, ensured most people would be glued to their TV or phone to stay informed.

The BLM incident started almost immediately when lockdowns began. Most people knew about the riots because they were already consumed with pandemic related coverage. At this point the media & politicians are fluctuating between BLM coverage and the pandemic.

The fear of COVID gave people a reason to stay informed via news/social media, the BLM coverage exploited this fear. For example, many media outlets proclaimed that blacks are more at risk for contracting COVID due to systemic racism, the CDC Director declared racism a serious public health threat, etc.


Black Lives Matter (BLM) was a violent movement that resulted in the death of innocent ...

Diversity Educators are Propaganda Pushers (w/audio)
April 29, 2022
Representation doesn't matter (w/ audio)

You read that correctly.

As a black and Hispanic woman (that's not my "identity", it's just what I am), I've never once felt the urge to seek outside validation from the media.

Why? Because my mother raised me to see myself as a human being, and not as a color or a gender.

Now that I'm a Christian, I can also say that seeking the approval of God is far more important than seeking the approval of other human beings. Of course, that's a conversation that most people aren't interested in having, but thankfully, religion isn't necessary to argue against shallow and narcissistic ideas.

What is the purpose of representation?

Some people might say that it's to make certain groups of feel more welcomed in a particular industry. "How can anyone strive to do ___(blank) when they don't see people who look like them?"

Go pull up the Brave browser (or Google, assuming you enjoy the intrusiveness of big tech), and search one of the following:

"black people in movies"
"gay people in politics"
"trans people in television"...

Representation doesn't matter (w/ audio)
December 08, 2023
GOTHIX Documentary: World Premiere

ATTN: as some of you know, the Gothix (dats me) documentary is premiering on December 19th!!!!

If you haven't subscribed yet, please make sure you use CODE: GOTHIX to get 10% off your subscription (this is also how we'll get paid since we're essentially forgoing the funding because we want to release the film now)

But also....WE'RE HAVING A THEATER PREMIERE! If you're in the Moscow, ID area, or can make the trip, we would love it if you joined us! You can find more info on this facebook event:

Back again. Did not realise the subscription has run out.

November 29, 2023
streaming live now! might do some call -ins!
November 30, 2023
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Is there scientific basis behind being LGBTQ?

Does science provide a valid justification for the LGBT lifestyle? Join us as we delve into this intriguing subject in response to a recent Jubilee debate! Click here to watch my video!


Now you might be asking, "Gothix, why the heck is this topic even important"? Well, my friends, this topic is VERY important for a couple of reasons.

The most obvious is that scientists DO NOT have the authority to establish moral laws.

If the argument is that certain behaviors are justified due to specific feelings being innate, then what's preventing scientists from justifying any other type of behavior? If we are to be intellectually consistent about this argument, then why would we blame anyone for anything they do, if science argues they are predisposed to a particular feeling? They can't help it! It's innate! you see the problem?


  • Science doesn't tell us anything about the world, scientists do. We rely on scientists to interpret scientific findings. Most people (including myself) don't have a background in biology or chemistry and simply regurgitate what they hear from scientists. All that to say, we have to remember that scientists are people and some people make mistakes or worse, LIE. The simple fact that homosexuality was REMOVED from a list of psychiatric disorders, should prompt us to question how much faith we have in "the science".

  • Morality does not come from nature. We can observe its patterns, but it doesn't tell us anything about how human beings are meant to live. What a monkey does in the wild has nothing to do with how human beings SHOULD behave. If there wasn't a distinction between the animal kingdom and the human species, then why aren't animals paying taxes like us?

  • No human, including scientists, has the authority to establish objective morality. An example that I like to use is understanding the components of a bomb. Science can show us how a bomb works, but science doesn't tell us if it's moral to use the bomb. We can form an OPINION based on what would happen if the bomb went off, (for example: human suffering and death are bad), but that would just be our opinion. What justification outside of human opinion is there to say using a bomb is wrong?

  • If homosexuality is a genetic occurrence, then why hasn't homosexuality ceased to exist, since same-sex couples can't reproduce, thus having no way to continue passing the 'gay gene'?

These are just a few things to consider as you try to engage people on this particular topic. As always, I highly recommend these two books

Stealing from God:

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November 25, 2022
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Bringing new life to a style dominated by death
My new merch line just dropped!

If you're like me and enjoy goth, punk, or alternative clothing, you might notice a consistent pattern in its imagery and marketing. Or, it's possible that you've never even given it a thought because you're so enamored by "how cool" the styles are. (I can relate)

Just this past year, I had to throw out half my wardrobe because I felt so ashamed that I had essentially become a walking billboard for death without even realizing it. A lot of the stuff I wore had patterns and slogans printed on it that depicted drugs, demons, violence, etc. and it got me thinking:

"Why are these symbols synonymous with that style of clothing?"  

Come to think of it, this realization probably explains why first-time viewers of my channel assume I'm crazy just based on my haircut, nose ring, or stage name. 

I don't believe alternative clothing should be dominated by degeneracy or the occult, nor do I think followers of Christ should force themselves to adapt styles that are more palatable to other believers.

With that in mind, I pitched an idea to the guys at No_System who hosted my previous merch line. I told them that I wanted to create a series of designs that represented different passages in The Bible, hoping to bring new life, to a style that's dominated by death. And as someone who recently became a believer this past year, these designs meant more to me than just a t-shirt.

Even if you don't consider yourself religious, I hope you'll still give some thought to the passages I selected and consider why darkness and the occult are so glamorized, in a society that constantly accuses followers of Jesus for pushing their beliefs onto others. 

And just so you know, I currently have a BLACK FRIDAY sale going on right now! Visit to get 25% off hats and hoodies, 35% off t-shirts, and 35% off stickers. Plus, free shipping on all orders over $50 🫶

Wearing my NEW worthless idols (Karl Marx) shirt. 


Psalm 96:5 - "For all the gods of the peoples are worthless idols, but the Lord made the heavens."

Karl Marx, the author of "The Communist Manifesto" made it his life's mission to "dethrone God and destroy capitalism." Marx dreamt of a communist revolution where religion would be abolished because he believed workers wouldn't need it if they found happiness in being equals. What Marx didn't understand was that human beings are created to worship, and when we reject God, we'll inevitably fill that void with something or someone else. Psalm 96:5 tells us that these worthless substitutes won't matter when our time on earth is up. 


Romans 12:2 - "Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect."
Culture is constantly changing, but change isn't always good. What was once unthinkable yesterday, is now socially acceptable today. This is why in Romans 12:2, we're urged to reject culture and abandon the chase of pleasure, possessions, and status—and instead, allow God to change us from the inside out.


Philippians 4:7 - "And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

Every day our lives are inundated with junk, and we often accept it wholesale by scrolling endlessly on social media or watching the news in hopes we'll hear something bad.  Stop that! Cling to what's good and rejecting the trash. 



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September 14, 2022
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Socialism is a religion for the lazy
Why good ideas don't always lead to good outcomes
Socialism, Marxism and Communism are ideologies that inevitably create more poverty, homelessness and despair than we could ever image while living under Capitalism. Which is ironic, because the entire premise of these ideas is that it's more humane than living under a capitalist system.
I can appreciate the sentiment of wanting to eliminate poverty and world hunger, trust me, It pains my heart to see people living on the streets, but socialism is counter initiative to human rights. 
Karl Marx, the man who wrote the Communist Manifesto, was not only a philosopher but a revolutionary socialist. Did I mention he was also broke? I suppose it should have been a warning sign that a broke socialist was criticising capitalism, but I digress. 
Marx never acquired a regular occupation or a dependable means of livelihood. He was bankrupt, always in debt and with half of his household goods stored away at the pawnshop. In fact, the co-author of the Communist Manifesto, Friedrich Engels, would give Marx thousands upon thousands of dollars, which would inevitably "melt away in his fingers like snow". (See The Naked Communist, page 38-42)
Marx was also an athiest who believed religion was the opium of the people, a sigh of the oppressed creature and the heart of a heartless world.
It's no wonder why you'll be pressed to find a socialist/Marxist who follows Jesus. Interestingly enough, if they DID follow Jesus as opposed to the writings of Marx, they wouldn't be socialists at all!
So for this post, I'd like to explore one section of The Bible, which succinctly explains why Marx "hated all Gods" and to help us understand why communist societies (like the Chinese government) do not allow religious freedom and persecute those who hold beliefs that challenge the communist party agenda. 

Warning Against Idleness 2 Thessalonians 3:6-15

"Now we command you, brothers, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that you keep away from any brother who is walking in idleness and not in accord with the tradition that you received from us."
  • I think it's reasonable to say that we're are all products of our environment. Some might be more susceptible to influence than others, but generally speaking, the more time we spend with positive and ambitious people, the more we'll begin to mirror their behavior. Likewise, if we're always around drunk, lazy, party animals, there's a high likelihood we'll become a sloppy degenerate. Proverbs 13:20 explains this perfectly: "Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm."
"For you yourselves know how you ought to imitate us, because we were not idle when we were with you, nor did we eat anyone's bread without paying for it, but with toil and labor we worked night and day, that we might not be a burden to any of you."
  • Why do you think doctors recommend exercise or learning a new skill to help combat depression? And why do some people choose to hang outside liquor or convenience stores for hours at a time? It's because they lack purpose. When depression begins to take hold of your mind, its harder to fight it off when you don't have something productive to focus on. Likewise, we can assume those who stand idle on street corners all day are probably up to no good. I know the typical response to this something to the effect of "well, maybe their poor! Maybe their homeless!". This part of scripture explains the importance of working for your food because it helps encourage perseverance and duty, which you wont learn by always expecting others to help you. 
"It was not because we do not have that right, but to give you in ourselves an example to imitate."
  • There's a famous quote that goes: "Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day; teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime." This concept is lost on many social justice ideologues when they infantilize the very people they're trying to help. If we're capable of achieving something positive in our lives, then the next rational step should be to lead by example as opposed to treating others like victims. 
"For even when we were with you, we would give you this command: If anyone is not willing to work, let him not eat. For we hear that some among you walk in idleness, not busy at work, but busybodies.  Now such persons we command and encourage in the Lord Jesus Christ to do their work quietly and to earn their own living."
  • Think of all the angry 'online activists' who spend their entire day online trying to "cancel" or shame a stranger for something they thought was wrong. These people are called busybodies. They waste all their time meddling into the affairs of others to "hold them accountable", instead of taking necessary steps to lead by example.

Additionally, there's a huge difference between not being ABLE to work, versus not WILLING. For those who are truly incapable of working (though, I believe that number is much smaller than people think) God commands us to be generous, kind and forgiving. But he also commands us to  build others up according to their needs (Ephesians 4:29) and sometimes people NEED encouragement so they can be inspired to practice self control, perseverance and discipline. 


"As for you, brothers, do not grow weary in doing good."
  • Pretty self explanatory. 

In case you haven't figured it out, God is NOT compatable with socialisim, and the Bible has an abundance of other sections that can be used to challenge marxisim, communism and social justice ideas (gender theory, anti-racism, etc.), which ironically, are all forms of religion in their own right. 

Therefore, the world should be very cautious to not blindly condemn religion as "a cult" without fully understanding what that particular belief system teaches. It's becoming more common for Americans in particular to write off the Christian Doctrine because, for most people, it's extremely difficult to believe in something they don't see or recognize it's importance when it challenges the very nature of their own beliefs. 
But If we're not careful, we're going to end up living in a society that normalizes hostility, bitterness and prejudice as opposed to kindness, forgiveness and love. I can assure you that while the world won't ever be perfect, following Karl Marx will certainly make it worse. 

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